social media

I’m distracted by social media and the Internet far too much. I would love to “give it up” completely, but it’s pull is very strong. How do those who have a healthier “relationship” with it keep it in check? I’ve deactivated my FB several times, not as a means to be “dramatic”, but as a way to, sadly, keep my spare time with my son and schoolwork in a more appropriate balance. It’s far too easy to get on and check for the latest updates and then fall down the rabbit hole.

I recently (as in, tonight) decided to give it up once again. Maybe I will at least last until the end of the semester so that I can focus all my attention on my school, Finn, and my new job. Maybe I won’t. I’m not worried about what other people think. I’m more trying to train myself not to reach for my phone first thing in the morning and to enjoy sitting on the couch with my son in the mornings (or afternoons now) doing absolutely nothing with my hands other than just holding him and cuddling, as opposed to rapidly moving my thumbs across my phone as I normally do.

Here are the reasons why my relationship with social media has become unhealthy:

  • Comparisons – I’m constantly comparing myself and my life to other people’s and it’s not healthy. It will start to wear on me and get me down when I constantly compare myself to other women and when I stop to think about it— I am actually really happy with my life and I don’t need to feel any other way.
  • Sharing for who? – Sometimes when I go to share a picture or a status update I’m not sharing for the joy of sharing, I’m thinking more about the response.
  • Empty relationships – A lot of my friendships have been maintained strictly through social media and I’ve started to wonder if that’s a friendship at all. If the only contact we maintain is a “like” or a comment here or there, are we really friends?
  • Public relationships – A lot of times I feel like my relationships with people are on public display and it feels phony. Relatives will say things to me that they don’t even say in person or I have to act like I am overly close with a friend because they said something nice when we really have no other contact outside of this medium.
  • Oversharing – This is something I struggle with. I’m a writer. Or at least I have always thought of myself as one. So I have this constant need to share and write whatever is going on in my head — which is a lot! At the same time, I’m always worried about this perfect balance of what is too much and not coming across as somebody who sits on my phone all day sharing every thought that comes to my head. Though, that’s really how it is some days! Also social media is an easy way for me not to write in other avenues, such as my blog; so it’s hindered me in a lot of ways.

Don’t get me wrong, there are still many plusses to social media and I’ve enjoyed them throughout the years but I’ve really developed an unhealthy relationship and I’m genuinely wondering if it could be an “addiction”. I don’t want my son to always see my glued to my phone and I don’t want to always be distracted from my studies by it.

We’ll see how I do – here goes!

One thought on “Distractions

  1. Christa

    I’ve certainly missed you and your musings and your day-to-day concerns and thoughts. But I also completely understand why you need to be “away.” In fact, ALL of your bullet points are things I struggle with, as well.

    I just devoured all three of your latest blogs, so I still get to hear what you’re up to and see how that’s affecting you…in more detail, even. I don’t always comment, but I do read them. Love you, cousin!

    P.S. If you lived nearby, we’d have visited your new place!

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